I’m not sure why I was so shocked to see another positive pregnancy test. Maybe I thought I would only ever see one in my life, or maybe I thought my body had been through so much with the first pregnancy and the first year of motherhood, that it was physically impossible to get pregnant again. But, there it was clear as day, two little lines – baby number two was on the way!
My excitement was very different this second time around. I was of course happy for Mike and I to bring another little girl or boy into this world, but I was most excited for Blake. Just as Blake made Mike and I “Mommy and Daddy”, this second baby would make Blake a “big sister”.
I have two younger sisters of my own, and looking back on my childhood, there’s not a single memory without them in it. We were best friends, partners in crime, and soul mates for as far back as I can remember. We share the same core, the same history of how we were brought up – and I’m excited for Blake to have that. A true and unconditional love like no other.
Like Blake, I am the oldest, and I know the responsibility that’s in store for her – and it’s big. She’ll be the big sis, the one he/she looks up to, follows around and takes the lead from. I’ve begun looking at Blake in a new light – witnessing her gentle qualities and kindhearted spirit – this girl was made to be a big sister, and I am so proud of her already.
I wish Blake could understand completely when I say to her, “you’re going to have a little brother or sister soon”. What I really want her to understand is that this little baby is going to make her life colorful and fun. This baby is going to give her a sense of companionship and the two of them will have their own little tribe. There will be fights, yes, but there will be so much more love and laughter. Life is about to change in a big way, for the best.
Baby Helms #2, we can’t wait to meet you!